Hyde Papers - Box 01: Folder 01

Letter from Julia Hyde to M. H. Goodale

Letter from Julia Hyde to M. H. Goodale
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Framingham Sept 6 {archivist note: 1840}

I fancy our thoughts have sent a few times between Marlboro + F. since last Monday morn. Certain I am that mine have flown towards M. many many times when they were not all absorbed by school. It seems all like a dream dearest Mary- these few days. Can it all be reality. Are we going back to Holyoke? If affords me pleasure, but not unmixed, ^{with pain} to think of returning- We shall miss our dear ones there whose loss can never be made up still I glad to think of going again to Mt. H.F.S - You told me to write a regular business letter - were you here I could talk very fast - I was alone (?) with Cousin Ellen and the baby - both sick and both for a few minutes asleep- I have not seen many such quiet moments this week - I improved them in thinking of the work before one these three weeks to come - woulds't know my thoughts? The light troubled me. I thought of Martha's shade lamp - then of wardrobe - I thought of our thibel dresses and thought if you altered your cape and trimmed with fringe I would do even so with mine twill be pleasant to have them alike- should you get fringe - get enough for me, will you dear? Thurs. Friday night. Another day of school gone- It has been pleasant for all had good lessons & were obedient.

My girls think I am going to be married because I leave so suddenly. Would you let them think I would do such "a foolish thing? " I tell the good people my health is not very good and I do not think I should teach in the winter at any rate- my health is good - except my voice & throat. I try to think how the people of M.talk about our going back to S.Hadley - Mrs. Barkin. what does she say? I love to think that we shall hear Mr. Lourie now and that we may again enjoy those sacred privileges. My heart is cold + dead- I do not enjoy intimate communion with my Savior and sometimes I fear I am no child of God - you have heard my say this so many times, are you weary of its sound. Warren- asks what are you doing for Christ! I suspect the question - what am I doing - Last night I was tired and sad - and I wept long and bitterly. I could scarcely tell why, save that my heart was overburdened and I could not feel that I had any right to apply the precious promises of the gospel to myself. I fear you will think I am in an unhappy {?} and desponding.

My darling Mary I intended to fill this sheet full this morning - but my time is a minus quantity - and it must go - or you will not get it on Sunday. I have many very many things to say, but I can not write. my mind is all confusion when I come home - my school will not be troubling me. Then I can think & plan. Now I am doing all I can - but that is not enough. I shall close my school - Friday morning. I hoped to have heard from home - but no letter comes, have they discarded their naughty girl? I do not blame them - O Mary you never saw such a place as this is - so much excitement! but I shall soon be away - Aunt Hanna is coming home with me - to " help me off" Do you wonder that I cannot write - you would not if you know the state of my mind. you are calm & collected - you are at home you must plan So dearie I must bid you goodbye & away to my duties- Excuse this? I know you will for the sake of Ellen - In a few days we will not be confined to writing.

Miss M.H. Goodale Marlboro, Mass {Postmark} FRAMINGHAM, MA SEPT 14

{written on same page} Hooks Eyes- Fringe Gloves Pocket Hand Kerchiefs Hair Brush & Comb Needles small darning Dress Stockings-Thread Shoes-Bonnet-Harpins Lasses Gingham or delaine {?} Shade lamp

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